Glee Recap: ?I Kissed A Girl?

November 30, 2011 by admin  
Filed under Uncategorized

It?s been two weeks since we last saw Glee, two weeks since that slap heard around the world when Santana?s hand met Finn?s cheek. So the episode starts off with Principal Figgins suspending her for two weeks because of said slap, and then Finn chimes in and says, no, it wasn?t a slap but more of a ?stage slap?. Santana is now off the hook.

So why she asks Finn. Why would he cover for her? ?You act out because you hurt inside,? he says. He asks Santana and the Troubletones to join New Directions this week. Finn lets everyone know that the assignment at hand is ?Lady Songs?. For ladies, by ladies. Finn tells Santana that everyone in the choir room knows about her and Brittany and they are accepting of her. Cue Klaine and their rendition of Pink?s ?Perfect?, dedicated to Santana. She is so unappreciative and tells them, ?Thanks, with all the horrible crap I?ve been through in my life, now I get to add that.? Rude!

Sue?s in a campaign crisis, and she thinks what she needs to do is be seen with a man. Like pronto. So she pulls out her black book and starts going through her list of man candy, notables of which include: Dan Quayle (too needy), Stephen Baldwin (trainwreck) and Matt Lauer (too much crying). LOL! Guess who she sets her sights on? Cooter. Yep, the Coach Bieste is gonna be none too happy about that.

Puck blasts out Melissa Etheridge?s ?I?m The Only One? and instead of singing to Quinn, it?s obviously directed to Shelby. Awk-ward. Quinn catches him in the hallways and tells him he should get his eyes checked because she calls him out on his singing to Shelby. She tells him that her mother will be out of town and invites him over. As he declines, she reiterates to him, whispering in his ear, ?You get to have sex with me.? Puck again says thanks, but no thanks, telling her that he used to think she was hot but now, not so much. Basically he tells her that she?s higher maintenance that Rachel, is selfish and he?d rather ?raw dog a beehive?. Omg, dying of laughter!

Santana asks Finn why he?s ?forcing her out of the flannel closet?, to which he tells her that she was his ?first?, and that it means something to him. He doesn?t want to see her get overwhelmed and end up killing herself. Finn sings an amazing slowed up version of ?Girls Just Wanna Have Fun? to Santana in the choir room. She?s moved. She?s crying at the end. Got a bit teary eyed myself. She thanks him. Hugs!

As Coach Bieste heads over to Breadstix to pick up her to go order, she finds Sue and Cooter on a date. Cooter asks if she?s okay and she tells him that she thought they ?were doing things?. Cooter claims he didn?t think that she was interested, never got any signals from her that she was. Poor Coach. Sad face.

It?s election time, time to cast your vote for President! Coach Bieste is in charge of elections and sees Coot and Sue together in the gym. Didn?t see this coming?Coach breaks out in song. ?Jolene?, by Dolly Parton. Hey now, Dot-Marie Jones can sing!

Santana is walking through the halls and all eyes are on her. Male eyes. A douchebag comes up to her and tells her, ?Girls like you are a challenge, they just need the right guy to straighten them out, and I?m just the guy to do it.? As Mercedes likes to put it, HELL to the NO. She, Brittany, Rachel, Tina and Quinn are there to lend support and basically tell the guy to back off which segues into ?I Kissed a Girl? by Katy Perry. At the end of the song, she tells everyone that she told her parents about her and they were accepting of it. She now needs to tell her Abuela before she sees the commercial. Surely Grandma would be okay with her sexual orientation, right? No, it didn?t go so well. Upon hearing the news that Santana ?loves girls like she should love boys?, Abuela told her that ?They?re called secrets for a reason,? and then orders her to leave her house, adding, ?I don?t ever want to see you again. You made your choice, now I have made mine.? Of course, Santana breaks down.

Kurt gets called into Principal Figgins office to tell him he won the election. But there?s a problem. Coach Bieste explains to Kurt and his Dad that he won by a considerable margin. There were more votes for him than there are students. Oy. Looks like the ballot boxes were stuffed. It wasn?t him, he swears. He tells Rachel and Finn that he?ll probably get suspended and after he goes off to find Blaine, Rachel tells Finn that she was the one who did it. She wanted him to win so that his NYADA application would kick ass. Finn tells her that she?d better tell Principal Figgins but she doesn?t want to, for fear of getting suspended.

Puck rushes to the hospital after receiving a phone call from Shelby, apparently the baby fell and split open her lip, blood everywhere, blah blah blah. Puck is there to comfort her and it leads to?yep, you guessed it. Ugh. Afterwards, Shelby tells Puck, ?this was a mistake? and tells him to leave. Pissed off, he goes to Quinn, wanting some ?anger sex?. As he tells her that he didn?t have protection, she waves him off, telling him NBD and they can make another baby. Whoa. Hold up. He goes all Dr. Phil on her, telling her that a baby or a guy isn?t going to make her feel special, and that if there?s anyone that?s gonna get the hell out of Lima and make something of themselves it?s her. He then proceeds to tell her about Shelby, but it needs to remain a secret. Sigh. All hell will break loose soon.

It?s Burt Hummel for the win! As Coot asks Sue what the status of their relationship is now that she lost the election, Coach Bieste walks in and declares her love for him, even though he claims he loves both she and Sue. Coach isn?t going down without a fight though and makes sure Sue knows that.

In the choir room, Kurt wishes Brittany well and congratulates her on her Presidential win. Santana sings ?Constant Craving? by k.d. lang. Shelby joins in. Rachel is seen crying, walks into the choir room and announces that she admitted to Principal Figgins that she was the one who stuffed the ballot boxes. For her actions it?s now on her permanent record, she?s suspended for a week and she?s banned from competing at Sectionals. GASP!

Photo Credits: Adam Rose/FOX, Beth Dubber/FOX

Tags: Glee, I Kissed A Girl, Recap

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